Greetings American People,
Americans weel believe me. Yes? Believe when told their President Obama is a seekrit Mooslim from Keenya. Believe when told Hillary Cleenton eez one who murder many dozens of people. Veence Foster, Ron Brown, even kitty cat that belong to some crazy lady.
Yes, shoor. Yoo Americans, I tell you that if I say Joos operate all media in USA and you should not believe media... you will leesten to me. Oh yes. That is an old one too. I thought we never get second bite of apple with that one. Ha ha. Hat tip to comrade Steve.
I tell you I have very top secret veedeo of Hillary Cleenton in welding helmet and leather apron delivering personally suitcase nuke to secret location inside Iran. Sure, you believe. No problem.
I tell you I have secret weeky leek document to show your Hillary Cleenton entering rehabilitation in Danmark for GHB problem. No problem.
I tell you I have secret transaction record of your Hillary Cleenton ordering
I tell your Sean Hannity that president Obama and your senator Warren unfollow Hillary on the Facebook and Hannity believe me. This Hannity - a real mastermind that one. You just can't make this stuff up you know.
See, I tell you so
I know, maybe sound crazy. But don't let that discourage you America.
I say to Mr. Trump to like me on the Facebook. Mr. Trump like me on the Facebook. I say to Mr. Trump he is yarkii and he believes I make great compliment and call him brilliant genius. I tell you, American people, so you believe me too.
But I tell you I cultivate Trump like plump garden морковь and you NO BELIEVE me? Ok then. Have your way.
For now I bid farewell and will look forward to helping more with you when your Mr. Trump eez in your White House.
Very truly yours,
VP