Monday, August 17, 2015

Bobby Jindal Performs Major Exorcism to Rid Public Square of Trumpfiend

douenaldus bellicosus daemonium

Bobby Jindal has decided to exorcise the body politic of the archfiend Donald Trump. After consulting the Rituale Romanum and conferring with The International Association of Exorcists in Rome Jindal has concluded that the only way to save his own political campaign from obsolescence is to take the leadership role and confront the pestilence head on.

"I’ve decided to randomly put his name into my remarks at various points, thereby ensuring that the news media will cover what I have to say.” (Washington Post)
By repeating the name of the malevolent Trump over and over again in his stump speeches and television appearances Jindal believes he will shift media focus away from the merciless tormentor and onto his own increasingly listless mission. Thereby evicting the unholy affliction from the media spotlight and clearing the way for Jindal Triumphant to prevail victorious. Exult and be joyful!

Looks good. Until Trump vomits all over him in front of a corn dog stand in Iowa.

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